It was not easy, and they attempted to thwart me at every turn. I easily obtained a Minneapolis Library card, but alas the Minneapolis Central Library is closed for renovations, taking with it all texts describing Commedia dell’Arte. Thus I attempted infiltrate St. Paul Central.

Alas the canny librarians demanded some proof that I was a resident of Minneapolis. I returned with a letter sent to my apartment, but that was not enough. It seemed that I needed something with both an address and a date. I was almost defeated, but finally returned to the library a third time, bearing all the necessary material, duping the librarians, and absconding with every text making even passing reference to the theatre style known as Commedia dell’Arte.

And the joke is on them. You see I am not a resident of Minneapolis, nor Minnesota, nor even the United States of America. I am a citizen of the small island nation of San Serriffe. I pay no local, state, or fedral taxes, but I commute into Minneapolis specifically barrow library books that I never intend to return. Take that municipal tax base.